29 June 2008

Second Draft

Twenty Feet Part 1: Julie

From twenty feet away, Julie fell in love with everything about Peter, before she even knew his name. He was the kind of guy she had always hoped she could somehow be cool enough to attract. The look of him made her try, through sheer force of will, to turn her mind’s eye into a camera—any kind of tool that would allow her to etch him indelibly into her memory the way Shakespeare boasted he could do with his pen.

From across the crowded living room her eyes took in every physical detail they could discern, from the shade of crimson he had dyed his hair—a red that Julie thought she’d be more likely to find in a crayon box than on a drug store shelf—to the holes in his worn acid-washed jeans, to the scuffs on his Dr. Martens boots. She knew the state of his clothing and the studied disheveledness of his hairdo had probably all been carefully cultivated, but somehow the fact that he would try so hard to look like such a mess somehow made him even more appealing to Julie.

It was natural for Julie to feel like a foreigner when she went to a party like this. She only ever went to parties because friends or coworkers invited her and she felt as though it would be either rude or pathetic to refuse. Large-scale casual social interaction never came easy to her, but she had been fine with not fitting in very well up until tonight. That guy, though… He made her wish for the first time that she was a bit more like these people at the party. She wanted the confidence they seemed to possess. She at least wanted to be able to speak to someone like him without fixating on the fear that her heart would immediately be ripped out and defenestrated without ceremony.

And then Laura was at her side, and she wrenched her eyes away from him, suppressing the irrational feeling that he would cease to exist the moment she stopped looking. Unfortunately, Laura was too quick for her.

“Have you seen something you like, for once?” She smirked knowingly. Laura had always invited Julie to these parties with the view of finding someone for her. Julie, however, doubted that Laura had ever had much hope of success.

“What? No! …Maybe,” was Julie’s awkward and half-dazed reply as she shook herself from her reverie.

“I see. Shall I introduce you?”

Julie was simultaneously ecstatic, impressed, and horrified.

“You know him? Wait, no. No! Really, Laura, it’s nothing.”

“Why do I not believe you?” Laura grinned and, before Julie could make a motion to stop her, moved back around the edge of the room towards the spot where the object of Julie’s gaze was in conversation with a couple of similarly punked-out partygoers.

Julie waited on tenterhooks with her heart in her throat. Half of her was hoping that the guy would blow Laura off and she’d be spared the humiliation of meeting him, the other half willing everyone but her and him to spontaneously disappear.

As Laura approached with the man who could not possibly be as perfect as Julie imagined in tow, Julie forced herself to breathe normally and attempted to look composed.

“Julie, this is Peter. Peter, Julie,” Laura said simply, and promptly disappeared in much the same fashion Julie had just hoped that all of the party guests would do just a moment ago.

“Julie,” said Peter with a winning smile, holding out his hand.

“Peter…” Julie replied, dazed, and put her own hand in his to shake it.

“You’re not quite as loquacious as Laura told me you were,” Peter said with a chuckle.

Julie reluctantly withdrew her hand from Peter’s and looked up at him cautiously, waiting for her image of him to be shattered.

“I hope she didn’t tell you too much,” Julie smiled, trying to figure out what color Peter’s eyes were without scaring him off.

“Don’t worry,” he replied dismissively. “Besides, I believe that sometimes you can tell a lot about a person from twenty feet away, if you know what to look for.

28 June 2008

Vocabulary Story

I've joined Trevor's writers' group as a way to keep myself motivated to be creative. The following is a vocabulary project (use certain words or phrases that are chosen the previous week in a story) that I did for tomorrow:

Date due: 06/29/08
Vocabulary: Crimson, Acid, Defenestrate, Foreigner, On Tenterhooks
Word count: 500-1000

Twenty Feet

Julie knew the moment she first saw him that he was the kind of guy for whom she had always hoped she could somehow be cool enough to attract. The look of him made her try, through sheer force of will, to turn her mind’s eye into a camera—any kind of tool that would allow her to etch him indelibly into her memory the way Shakespeare boasted he could do with his pen. But even as she remembered (with a mental facepalm) that her phone had a camera, she also realized that she would never have the courage to take a picture of him. So she stared at him across the crowded living room of the house that belonged to a coworker’s friend’s cousin’s family in an absurd parody of a scene from a classic romance film.

From twenty feet away, Julie fell in love with everything about Peter, before she even knew his name. Her eyes took in every physical detail they could discern, from the shade of crimson he had dyed his hair—a red that Julie thought she’d be more likely to find in a crayon box than on a drug store shelf—to the holes in his worn acid-washed jeans, to the scuffs on his Dr. Martens boots. She knew the state of his clothing and the studied disheveledness of his hairdo had probably all been carefully cultivated, but somehow the fact that he would try so hard to look like such a mess somehow made him even more appealing to Julie.

It was natural for Julie to feel like a foreigner when she went to a party like this. She only ever went to parties because friends or coworkers invited her and she felt as though it would be either rude or pathetic to refuse. Large-scale casual social interaction never came easy to her, but she had been fine with not fitting in very well up until tonight. That guy, though… He made her wish for the first time that she was a bit more like these people at the party. She wanted the confidence they seemed to possess. She at least wanted to be able to speak to someone like him without fixating on the fear that her heart would immediately be ripped out and defenestrated unceremoniously.

And then Laura was at her side, and she wrenched her eyes away from him, suppressing the irrational feeling that he would cease to exist the moment she stopped looking. Unfortunately, Laura was too quick for her.

“Have you seen something you like, for once?” She smirked knowingly. Laura had probably always invited Julie to these parties with the view of finding someone for her, but Julie doubted that Laura had ever held up much hope that her scheming would yield any results.

“What? No! …Maybe,” was Julie’s awkward and half-dazed reply as she shook herself from her reverie.

“I see. Shall I introduce you?”

Julie was simultaneously awed and horrified.

“You know him? Wait, no. No! Really, Laura, it’s nothing.”

“Why do I not believe you?” Laura grinned and, before Julie could make a motion to stop her, moved back around the edge of the room towards the spot where the object of Julie’s gaze was in conversation with a couple of similarly punked-out partygoers.

Julie waited on tenterhooks with her heart in her throat. Half of her was hoping that the guy would blow Laura off and she’d be spared the humiliation of meeting him, the other half willing everyone but her and him to spontaneously disappear.

As Laura approached with the man who could not possibly be as perfect as Julie imagined in tow, Julie forced herself to breathe normally and attempted to look composed.

“Julie, this is Peter. Peter, Julie,” Laura said simply, and promptly disappeared in much the same fashion Julie had just hoped that all of the party guests would do just a moment ago.

“Julie,” said Peter with a winning smile, holding out his hand.

“Peter…” Julie replied, dazed, and put her own hand in his to shake it.

“You’re not quite as loquacious as Laura told me you were,” Peter said with a chuckle.

Julie reluctantly withdrew her hand from Peter’s and looked up at him cautiously, waiting for her image of him to be shattered.

“I hope she didn’t tell you too much,” Julie smiled, trying to figure out what color Peter’s eyes were without scaring him off.

“Don’t worry,” he replied dismissively. “Besides, I believe that sometimes you can tell a lot about a person from twenty feet away, if you know what to look for.



26 June 2008

You Know Your Church is Conservative When...

Guy = the father in one of the main families in the church




Guy: So, how's work life treatin' ya? I bet you learn a lot.

Me: Yeah, mostly I'm learning to become bitter about the injustice of the legal system.

Guy: Yeah, but what about that Supreme Court decision today? At least they've got one thing right! Second Amendment! [I swear he might have said Fourth Amendment]

Me: But I don't like that decision. I hate guns.

Guy: I guess up in Washington [D.C.] all of the bad guys have guns and the good guys don't.

Me: I don't think the "good guys" should have guns, either. One person does not constitute a "militia."


He laughed me off rather good-naturedly and our way of "agreeing to disagree" was to agree that it would be acceptable for civilians to protect themselves and their property with paintball guns. I decree that the use of painball guns in self defense constitutes a reasonable and non-deadly force.

I get really upset at this definition between the so-called "good guys" and "bad guys" now, especially with this controversy over GITMO. Don't the "bad guys" have the same rights as the "good guys," even if they broke the law? Isn't that the foundation of our justice system? Plus, I don't like people calling my clients "bad guys," even if they have done horrible things.

24 June 2008

Move-In Update

I am still not completely moved in, due mostly to the fact that Trevor and I do not have a dresser that can fit all of my clothing, let alone both mine and his. We have been hunting for a new dresser for weeks, but progress has been slow. This weekend we finally gave in and decided to spend about twice as much as we had initially planned to spend because we found the perfect dresser. It is a solid pine double dresser with three sock-type drawers, two medium-depth drawers, and four deep drawers. Its two downsides are that 1) it was expensive, and 2) it came unfinished. After laboring over the decision for several days, Trevor and I finally decided that we would be unhappy if we settled on anything else, and that it would be a good long-term investment if we really made it our own through the staining process. Apparently it was still quite cheap for what it is; just expensive by our standards.

The stain I chose is called "Island Water," a beautiful green-tinted blue. For some reason I have long cherished the desire to stain a piece of furniture blue. I have no idea why. We are on day two of sanding and progressing on schedule, despite being covered in sawdust all the time and having sore hands. We hope to finish sanding tomorrow night (Thursday at the latest), and get staining done by Friday night at the latest. That gives us Saturday and Sunday (and Monday if we need it) to put the three coats of sealant on, and the dresser can be moved in and set up before I start work next week, which would *really* be helpful as I desperately need to unpack the rest of my clothing. I'm definitely posting pictures of this wooden behemoth when it's done. I also plan to buy some sort of special knobs (though not too expensive) to jazz up its look a bit. If you're going to do something like this, you have to do it right!

Lastly, Trevor and I have finally begun an exercise regimen, going three times a week since last Friday. I'm really hoping we can stick to this because I think it will end up giving me more energy and making me feel better about myself as I move into a new stage in my life. Plus, our 24-Hour Fitness has crazy high-tech bicycle machines that have built-in fans!

19 June 2008

Slightly Better

I think part of the reason for my recent pessimism is that I feel like I'm getting sick, but it hasn't really turned into anything, and I've been like this for four days now. I'm not sick enough to stay home from work, but I'm still feeling bad enough to make getting through a work day pretty difficult. I'm hoping that this weekend I can be productive and get some good down time in so that I'll feel less stressed and less ill. Thank you all for your concern in any case.

You might notice that I now have Twitter. We'll see if it proves motivating for me to create interesting content. It may be just like the Facebook status in the end.

14 June 2008

Maladjusted

The weekend is finally here--a three-day weekend in which I do not have to graduate, move all of my worldly possessions, or drive halfway across America--, so of course, I'm miserable.

I'm not sure I even really know why. Maybe I slept too late. Maybe I'm just stressed out about the fact that we still have so much moving in to do and things to buy before the apartment is a real home. I just feel so exhausted and so unenthusiastic all the time. It's as if I'm not even on the Lithium at all. I'm timid and easily upset and I never want to go hang out with anyone that I'm not extremely close with. This means that I'm often at home alone while Trevor hangs out with his friends. It's not that I don't want to socialize, it's just that I'm upset at the prospect that these are the only people (besides Trevor) in Olympia who I can remotely call my friends, but they're really just acquaintances. Once I realize that, I become even more depressed at the thought that Trevor is my only real friend for at least thirty miles.

I know Tacoma isn't that far away, but it's still a significant drive for me, especially since I don't have my own car, and gas prices are what they are, and I have precious little free time to make those kinds of trips. I'm so used to being surrounded by friends at all times, and now I'm either hanging out with Trevor or I'm alone. I love spending time with him, but I don't want my life to revolve around him, because I know that will only cause more problems in the end. I'm afraid I'll become clingy and that'll put him off and everything will turn into a huge mess.

I know I should be trying to make new friends in Olympia since I'm going to be here for a while, but that just doesn't seem likely at this point. I love my bosses, but I doubt we'd hang out much outside of work. Almost all of Trevor's older (from high school) friends are either married or engaged, and I can't see ever becoming close with any of their wives/fiancees, and his newer friends all go to Evergreen, which means they're pretty cool, but still not the kind of people I could see myself hanging out with on my own. And where else can I meet friends? I don't even really want to make new friends. I just want to be able to still spend time with the old ones. It just breaks my heart to realize that never again can I just spontaneously decide that I want to watch a movie at home with Wren, Matt, and/or Daryl. Instead, I'd have to think of the idea early enough in the evening so that, assuming they're not working or doing schoolwork, one of us could drive to the other one's house. Ugh.

So I'm not sure what to do. Maybe tomorrow I'll be over it. Sometimes that happens. Or maybe I'll never really be over it, but I'll just have to learn to live with it. Everyone else makes these transitions look so easy.

04 June 2008

More Coffee Shop Antics

As I walked into work this morning, I looked (as I always do) into the window of the coffee shop in the ground floor of our building (the one referenced in this post). Instead of doing a happy jig, this time two of the employees were hugging very earnestly and quietly. I was half horrified that something awful happened and half suspicious that they were just trying to psych each other out, or that they really "like, love you man" each other (especially since one of them hurt his arm and is on mind-altering pain meds right now). I don't care if he is drugged out, he still makes the best brownies I've ever had. Perhaps the two facts are related.
*****
Yesterday
Jodi and I went down to the coffee shop for amazing brownies that we could smell through the window.

Jodi: "Wow! Cupcakes! When did you guys start making those?"
Guy with hurt arm: "Today! I got an icing set yesterday and I was like 'Dude, Jason, I'm gonna go bake for two hours' and he was like 'Yeah, whatever' and I made cupcakes!"
Jodi: "Awesome! Did you put the sprinkles on?" *indicates pink sprinkles*
Guy with hurt arm: "No, Jason did. But I did the icing!"

I have never seen a man so excited about cupcakes with pink sprinkles before. I hope it was his own enthusiasm and not the pain meds.

02 June 2008

Perhaps I should do this more often...

I walked down the cookie aisle of Safeway on Sunday afternoon (a very busy time for grocery shopping), saying (half to myself, half to Trevor), "I'm not going to buy cookies. They're expensive and bad for me. I don't need cookies. Unless grasshoppers are on sa--OH MY GOD GRASSHOPPERS ARE ON SALE!" after which I proceeded to snatch a package of grasshopper cookies and skip merrily down the aisle while a young mom (innocently shopping for rice snacks) tried not to burst out laughing.

Do I have to grow up?

Secure in Their Faith

I was on my way to Wren's house on Saturday when I passed by a church, which had the following on its readerboard:

"I made Chuck Norris." -God

I want to go to that church.